Oddball Update

It’s an interesting day. Actually, that adjective — “interesting” — is just a whole lot of nothing. Ever noticed how we use that word to describe things when we really don’t have any feelings about them? When we feel so completely indifferent and apathetic toward something, we’ll pull out some generic word like “interesting” to describe it? Which is strange, because I haven’t exactly been indifferent or apathetic toward this day. I’ve been more like “pissed off” at it. That’s starting to subside, and I’m only just approaching some semblance of apathy now.

Apple and I returned from China two days ago, although it wasn’t until yesterday afternoon that we actually got back to Hat Yai here in southern Thailand. Due to the layover between flights, we spent the interim in Bangkok, which is even more crowded and noisy than I remembered. (Perhaps it’s gotten even busier since 2004?) All was going well (except for the leaking toilet in our hotel room, which turned the bathroom into a lake) until we got back to Hat Yai. A few hours later I started to feel weird.

At first, I thought I was just tired from the trip. But by yesterday evening, I had a full-blown sickness going on, of some unidentifiable type. Fever, chills, full body aches, and a creeping nausea that would oscillate between “barely there” and “going to puke any minute now.” I never did throw up, fortunately, and managed to get a decent amount of sleep. We spent the night in the front room of Apple’s house, which has a much more efficient air conditioner and is quieter than the back room where we normally sleep. The only problem was the bed, which was basically a board…not unlike a futon. Sleep came in batches, between which I attempted to find some position that wasn’t causing absolute pain. Usually this required putting bunched-up heaps of my blanket between myself and the wooden bed. After nearly twelve hours of this, I felt significantly better.

Today has been off-and-on, health-wise. The fever is mostly gone now but at times it will flare up (like when I leave the air conditioning in the loft on too long, since it has no thermostat which would allow it to turn on and off by itself). I haven’t been able to eat much today but am starting to get hungry now, which is a good sign. My stomach still won’t agree with anything I put into it, but what can ya do. Tylenol is helping stave off the worst of it. For the present, I’m in a bit of a stupor, so today’s post is likely to be somewhat random. I also don’t guarantee that any of it will make any sense, so consider yourself warned.

More than anything, for the first few hours of the day I was supremely frustrated by the work issues in my email inbox, which embodied the absolute picture of “I don’t give a shit.” Seriously, when you feel ready to throw up at any moment, the last thing you want to do is try and devise new and brilliant solutions to programming problems. I can barely click on the correct folder in Windows Explorer today, to say nothing of my abilities to be a coding genius. And for some reason the Internet connection here today is very slow, something akin to 256k DSL. I’m not sure what’s going on, but it’s working well enough for casual business, which is all I have the strength for today anyhow.

While gearing myself up to actually do something productive today, I spent some time browsing the Web for other blogs. I only do this when I get extremely bored or exhausted, because blog-browsing always ends up wasting so much time that I usually don’t even entertain the thought. A few days back, I decided to ratchet up the visibility of Oddball Update by notifying Technorati every time I post something — Technorati, for those who don’t know, is essentially a searchable blog directory. I get next to zero visitors here who aren’t friends or family members, and I began to think that perhaps some additional exposure might prove interesting.

After “claiming” my site on Technorati and setting up a brief profile, I absent-mindedly clicked over to a few other random blogs that I happened to find there. In fact, I remember searching for any blog posts about the Pizza Hut Book It program scandal that I myself mentioned a few days ago. Not many people were talking about it, but I found a Blogger site belonging to a guy in New England who, apparently, thinks rather frighteningly like me on a number of arcane subjects. He even grew up in Michigan in the ’80s, possibly somewhere in the metro Detroit area from the sound of it. His most recent post, in fact, mentions the old Detroit Zoo TV commercials where all the animals are seen strutting around with goofy voices dubbed in, which I had completely forgotten about but remembered instantly upon being reminded of it. Crazy.

I would actually rather enjoy just reading blogs all day, seriously. Reading other folks’ creative outlets online helps to stir up the most abstract thoughts in my own head, which would inevitably lead to rambling if I went to my own site to spew them forth. In fact, I think that’s what separates me from many bloggers in the “personal blog” realm. I don’t post random, willy-nilly garbage all that much; instead, I tend to post either when there’s something in my life that might interest my friends or family, or about headlines or other logical, issue-based arguments. Rarely do I post something as random as some of the stuff that’s out there, like people talking only about how much they love their shoes, or whatever else.

It’s a bit of a quandary, really. I sometimes feel as though I’d like to post more of that random, meaningless garbage — because in an odd way, such stuff can actually mean more to a total stranger reading my blog than would, say, a post about what’s going on in my life right now. At the same time, I’m grounded by this sense of not wanting to pollute the Internet with complete drivel, of the kind that may inspire someone, but is not guaranteed to. A friend once said that personal websites were a waste of bandwidth on the Internet. That was ten years ago now. Still true? I doubt many would agree.

In a large way, I think this internal struggle can be tied into American culture. Apple and I were talking during one of our many airport waits this past week, and we got to discussing American culture vs. Asian culture. There are many things about American life that Apple cherishes, such as the kinds of homes we live in (and the way that a man’s wife is not expected to live with and take care of his parents!). What she sees as troublesome, though, are how addicted Americans are to order, procedure and predictability. It is both what makes the United States a safe and orderly place to live, and at the same time makes our lives increasingly complicated.

In Thailand, for instance, if you’re out driving and need to stop and pick up some fruit, or the laundry, or what-have-you, you simply drive to your destination, park your car in the street and run inside. If you’re thoughtful, you leave your hazard lights or signals on. While this clogs up the road, nobody seems to mind. In fact, there’s a general sense of “go along to get along” all throughout Thai society. People cut you off in traffic, drive on the wrong side of the road or do other bonehead things, and the most that happens is that you beep your horn briefly as if to say “Whoa, that’s dangerous.” Or, “I’m here too, so be careful.” In America, you don’t even touch the horn because that might get a 9mm pointed in your face, or touch off a homicidal game of cat-and-mouse brake-checking or other recklessness for the next five miles. Hell, I’ve even been guilty of it myself on occasion (not pulling a nine, certainly, but some other questionable road maneuvers designed to intimidate and emotionally punish).

The problem is that we Americans, by and large, just take mundane stuff way too seriously. I’m notoriously guilty in this department. Although I have gotten better in the sense that I no longer harbor ill will or anger for extended periods of time, I still do a fair amount of complaining about any number of stupid things that irk me, like somebody driving too slow or parking crooked, or the mail arriving later than usual, or the rare occasion when our next-door neighbors sit up and talk loudly on their lanai at midnight when I’m trying to sleep. None of this stuff affects my life for more than a few seconds, usually, but I (and many other Americans) take it to heart. We’re all frustrated, easily irritated and seriously lacking in patience. And it’s getting worse.

The Asian perspective on American life is that it’s about three things: “Fast, full and busy.” When I heard that, I was amazed at how succinctly our lifestyle could be summed up. We feel that we are not worthwhile if we’re not constantly doing something, engaged in some productive activity or work of some kind. If our calendars aren’t stuffed full of activities from sunup to sundown, we feel that we’re wasting time. And everything has to happen faster, faster and faster all the time, like even being able to pay our bills instantly over the Internet is slow and inefficient if the server takes ten seconds to respond instead of the five we expect it to take.

What’s interesting is that so many Asian nations get so much more done while inducing so much less stress. You’ve heard stories about the Asian workers who compete with us in the global economy, and how they get more done with less. And yet, some of these folks have less stressful lives than us in America. It’s because they can go out to a family dinner, then talk and drink for hours without feeling like they’re wasting precious time. It’s because they can do their errands on the spur of the moment, without endlessly worrying about how they’re going to avoid inconveniencing someone, or making a mile-long plan about how they’re going to hit all of the waypoints on their daily plan in the most efficient amount of time, avoiding all of the traffic hotspots and other pitfalls. Their minds are clearer without the overwhelming order and procedure of daily life, so they can put that much more energy into their actual jobs. At least, that’s my take on it. Life here in Thailand may not be as safe or predictable as our cushy American lives, but in many ways, it can be more satisfying.

Still, that’s not to say either Apple or myself are in a hurry to relocate to Asia anytime soon. While American life can be exhaustingly fast-paced and unnecessarily filled with minutiae, there are many, many things to be enjoyed about it. The great number of conveniences and luxuries that come to us relatively affordably, for example. And our orderly lives do mean that our routines are often quite predictable, for those who don’t like surprises (read: me). And most importantly, the independence and self-reliance that all good Americans come instilled with is priceless. It’s our go-anywhere, do-anything attitude which keeps us afloat, and gives us hope.

Apple and I will be flying back to our home in Florida in about two weeks, having already spent the last month in Thailand (plus a week in China). As our return trip approaches, we’ve had time to talk about some of the ways our lives will be changing once we arrive home — in some cases, changing in very big ways. But for the immediate future, here are some of the things I’m most looking forward to upon returning:

• Driving.
• Our home — a quiet, private space we can call our own.
• Our big, soft bed with the humongous comforter.
• All of my technology and gadgetry.
• Large, comfortable bathrooms.
• Freedom — to go places, do things and live in whichever way we decide.

In the meantime, I’m going to try and get rid of this yucky, sick feeling and get back on track. My boss and his wife (with whom we stayed in China) will be visiting us here in Thailand next week, so we’ll have some new and interesting things to do. And he’s bringing with him an old gem from my past — a freshly-downloaded VHS rip of Howard the Duck. Oh, sweet Jesus.

Categorized as Randomness