Mr. Cylon doesn’t appreciate being referred to as a chrome toaster.

In December, The Sci-Fi Channel aired a Battlestar Galactica miniseries. Basically it was a “reimagined” take on the original show, featuring the same basic concept but with several wild variations. At the time it seemed like some of the changes were just too ridiculous for my tastes, so I didn’t bother to watch it. Now I wish I had. I’m starting to really get into Battlestar for some odd reason. I remember when I was a kid, I used to think it was pretty boring. Which is odd, because I was a huge Star Trek fan. But now—better late than never, I guess—I find myself wanting to check out the old series, and this new remake.

Only problem is, Sci-Fi doesn’t seem to care enough about either series to air them! They own the rights, but won’t broadcast. The other day, they ran a classic Battlestar marathon for a day. My TiVo only recorded one episode of it—it was a “suggestion” that it thought I would like—and it was right. I just wished it had taped the rest of them too! Now I find that Battlestar isn’t on the schedule again for at least the next month. Bah. I want to see it! It’s got to be better than showing “Hercules: The Legendary Journies” a bazillion times!

Not only that, but their new remake? Gone. It aired maybe twice back in December, then it was pulled. Whenever Sci-Fi does something themselves—a “Sci-Fi Original”, they call it—they hype it up beyond all rational belief. Usually this seems comical, because almost every “Sci-Fi Original” is absolute crap. Original movies with names like “Rats”, “Bugs”, “Webs” and “Skeeter” do not exactly conjure up images of must-see television (instead, they conjure up images of Mystery Science Theater 3000’s most boring episodes, which ironically Sci-Fi also airs on Saturday mornings). Strangely, when it comes to their high-and-vaunted Battlestar remake, written by one of the guys behind the creation of Star Trek: TNG, they’re surprisingly quiet. If you watched the Sci-Fi channel back in October-November, which I did because Knight Rider was on, you might not have seen a single commercial. I didn’t.

So now I’ve heard some talk about the new miniseries, and a lot of people really liked it. Before it came out, everybody was tearing it to shreds because the creators did weird stuff like convert the Starbuck character into a female role, and the Cylons no longer look like toasters with red eyes, but basically just like synthetic humans (androids, in other words)—yeah, that’ll save the costume department some big moolah! But from what I’ve heard of the plot, it sounds really cool. And the sets are unbelievably fantastic, while somehow managing to capture the same vibes as the original show’s expansive (and expensive, no doubt) sets. The miniseries sounds worth seeing just for that.

But Sci-Fi’s not airing it, which is lame. Although I think I know why. It seems that Amazon’s catalog contains an entry for the miniseries on DVD, albeit not yet produced. But I have a feeling that it may be going to disc, and that’s why Sci-Fi doesn’t want to air it any more than they can get away with. They want people to buy it and pay them money.

Speaking of DVD, the original ‘70s series is available in its entirety on DVD already, but there again is another case of accessibility. It’s “not available in any store”, apparently. You can get it from Amazon, but good luck finding it retail. Grrrr. I don’t want to rack up yet another charge on the credit card when I’ve got the cash in my wallet. Again, I know the reason for this. The first issue of this boxed set was a limited edition, and the new standard edition (featuring all the same material) is due out on February 10th. So I could pick it up then, but I’m annoyed because I want it now. Ah, selfish desires! Well, we’re all allowed to have them.